Current mood: blessed
I feel so very blessed right now. Sometimes I let life sweep me up in its whirlwind so much that I lose track of both time and whats really important in life. Today Mia reminded me how I need to slow down and enjoy what IS rather than what will be or what was.
She didn't do anything special, no special dancing, no special Mama kisses, no words at all... all she did was be herself. As I rocked her in my arms in her room before her bedtime (a night time ritual with us) I just sat there and enjoyed her. I listened to her breathing slowly become more deep as she relaxed and slowly difted off to sleep. I knew she felt safe in my arms and was completely content. I cuddled my warm little well... big bundle in my arms and just watched her. Right then I was at peace with the world. Nothing was stressing me out, pressuring me, making me anxious or making me sad. At that very moment I just enjoyed being a Mama and felt completely happy.
Tears began to well up and my throat tightened. I reflected back on all that we had gone through together. I helped create this little bundle of joy that I was holding my arms. Everything I did, all the sacrifices I made carrying her those 9 months was all for her and well worth it. All the lack of sleep, self-lessness and work I now do to make sure all her meals are freshly cooked, she is bathed and clean, her clothes are always freshly washed, giving her emotional support as well as freedom she needs, and most of all, all the countless hours I spend with her making sure she is happy. Everything I do, I do for her and its worth every second. As I look down at her I realize for once... maybe I am doing a good job as her Mama. I feel proud of myself for being such a good Mama to her. I admit I am not perfect but I try my hardest to be for her.
I love my daughter more than life itself. There is nothing I wouldn't do for her. She is my blessing from God.. the answer to all my prayers and my little perfect angel. I love her so much and not a day goes by that I don't thank God for blessing me with one of his angels.
I love you Mia, you are and always will be my little Butterfly Princess....
