Current mood: anxious
Well today is the big day I mentioned earlier. Today is the day Daddy takes Mia to San Diego with him to go to a MicroSoft conference. This has been planned for months now, the only thing is we didn't expect that I would still be recovering from my surgery this far along. Unfortunately I am. The recovery is so slow, though I am getting better. At first I didn't like the idea of her going only because I know how she can get after awhile and I knew it would probably mean Adrian would have to be up and down with her the whole time and miss most of the conference. But, I still can't pick her up so I can't take care of her alone here at the house all day.
This morning we agreed that I would "try" to take care of her in the morning to see how it goes and if I would be able to take care of her during the day alone (first time since my surgery two weeks ago tomorrow) When I got up this morning I tried to pick her up and right away my surgery area started to throb, sting and hurt... not good. After I put her down I attempted to change her diaper and even that was causing pain so there was no way I could take care of her all afternoon today. (They would be gone from 10am-7pm) So I reluctantly gave in and agreed Adrian should take her with him.
So I packed up her diaper bag, made her a lunch and gathered some other things for her. Adrian packed up his laptop loaded with Gabba and Elmo episodes and some headphones for her to watch while they are there. It worked in the doctors office not sure if it will be as successful during the long conference hopefully it will be. We also packed some toys like her favorite beaded necklace her Grandpa Pizano bought her and some other little things.
Then it was time to say goodbye. It was so hard! Especially since this is the first time she will be going that far away from me. I am always with her since she was born, other than that one time when she was 3 months old, and we went to Vegas for a day but she was here at home with her Grandparents and I knew they wouldn't take her out. I am alittle nervous but I have full confidence in Adrian and I know she will be ok. I couldn't say that with anyone else. Anyways after kissing her bye I watched Daddy load her up in her car seat, say goodbye and drive off to start their big adventure together.
As soon as I shut the garage door, one thing hit me like a ton of bricks... it was how quiet the house was. The silence was deafening. No Elmo was on TV, no music coming from her baby monitor, no baby jibberish and screams, nothing but the buzz of the fridge. Its kind of eerie and really sorta of sad. They haven't been gone 10 mins and I already miss her!!!! Sigh... I guess its the sting of motherhood. I have been so fortunately that all through her first year and a bit more, I have been with her every second of everyday. I am not currently working and she goes where ever I go. However, now I just can't solo her yet. Like I mentioned before this surgery recovery is pretty bad. I can't push myself or it will just take that much longer to get back on my feet. I am almost there but not quite, maybe a few more days I hope.
Now what to do with my free time I never had before?!?! I think I will just go back to bed or try to straighten up what I can around the house. I feel antsy I need to distract myself... hey maybe I will just go back onto facebook and play more games. Ah well, anyways I should end it here since I am sure I will have a big story to write about when they get back so stayed tuned....
